Sunday, January 23, 2022

Tuesday, December 28, 2021

How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others (EATING DISORDER RECOVERY CHAT)

How to stop comparing your food and your body to others in eating disorder recovery. Join me for a cake and a coffee, and a chat about... how to overcome food comparison? How to continue with eating disorder recovery, knowing you have to eat MORE than others? How to keep working towards your recovery goals?

Sunday, December 12, 2021

Eating Disorder Q&A | Weight Gain, Amenorrhea & Twin Rivalry

Eating disorder Q&A: how I recovered from my eating disorder, increased my metabolism, and stopped comparing myself to others... and a whole lot more!

Sunday, December 5, 2021

Welcome, Warriors! ❤

Hi there! My name is Hanne Arts and a I'm a Psychology graduate, author, YouTuber, and recovery warrior. I started writing when I was about seven, and I began incorporating some of my own mental health struggles into my works from the age of thirteen. I published my debut novel, JUST PERFECT, in December 2014, followed by its sequel, RED RIBBONS, in October 2017.

But that's quite a condensed version of my life, don't you think?










As a child, my life was perfect.  

That is, until it wasn’t anymore.  

In January 2010, I was diagnosed with an eating disorder, anorexia. In February 2010, I was hospitalized. Since then, I have been in and out of hospitals, consistently struggling to build my life up whilst sliding back down.

If someone would have told me, even just five years ago, that things would get better, I don’t think I could have suppressed my laughter. It would have been sinister laughter. Why-on-earth-would-you-say-that laughter, like that of an evil character in a children’s film. I did not believe that I would ever make it out; I felt helpless and trapped in the embrace of an illness that once, just briefly, had promised me that everything would be fine. Everything would be okay if only I tossed out that snack, if only I skipped that meal.  

For almost six years of my life, my mind was consumed. I was obsessed. I fell into the eating disorder’s arms, unable to break free. Every morning and every night, I would sneak upstairs to weigh myself. Every mealtime, I would consider how to get away with eating less and less. Every night, I cried myself to sleep. I felt worthless. I wished for a way out.  

I wished to sleep. Forever. When the morning sun awoke me from a restless night, I was disappointed. A new day – the same struggles.

Meanwhile, I saw my parents break down. Whilst I turned into a shadow of my former self, they crumbled. They forced me to eat, threatened me with hospitalization, and showered me with more love than I knew anyone could hold within one’s heart. And I hated them for it.  

After all, it was the one thing keeping me there. It was the only thing keeping me tied to the life I so desperately wanted to step out of.  

They sobbed and I sobbed; they sent me to treatment and I went. Gradually, the weight crept up. Gradually, the bad moods lifted, if even just a little. What was there, I wondered, further down this path? Would the veil that obscured my life finally lift? Was there a light at the end of the tunnel?  

There was no way to know. Not unless I followed the path. And I decided it was worth the risk.   

Let me tell you now, it is worth the risk. It is a winding road, but it is paved; there are poisonous berries and thorn bushes, but no bad wolves or evil gnomes. It sure as hell is a safer route than the alternative, and I really think you should consider it. You won’t know if you don’t try.   

Had I not taken the risk, I would have never known. I would have never experienced the wonders that make up life. I would have never experienced shameless pleasure, unapologetic joy, and that incredible emotion that comes so naturally to children – carefree nonchalance.   

Today, I live abroad, I attend university, and I have a boyfriend. Food is no longer at the forefront of my priorities list. I am ED- thought and behaviour free. I have a successful YouTube channel and two much-praised published books. I work, I travel, I enjoy my life.  

And I know that I will wake up tomorrow morning, excited when the sun awakes me from a restful sleep.

WHAT I EAT IN A DAY | 3,500 kcal (ED Recovery & Getting Back on Track)

What I eat in a day: 3,500 calorie meal plan edition! Today I'm getting back on track whilst showing YOU just what I'm doing to get there. Read on for the details of my gym workouts and meal plan for the day!

Sunday, November 14, 2021

Cupshe Athleisure Try On Haul | FEELING CONFIDENT AFTER WEIGHT GAIN

Today is a Cupshe athleisure wear try on haul & honest review! Let me know your favorite gym outfit and your best self-confidence tip in the comments, and don't forget to like and subscribe! 

Sunday, November 7, 2021

*Honest* Weight, Life and Mental Health Update Weight, life and mental health update

This was long overdue, so today I am finally back to tell you where I have been (in my life / eating disorder journey / mental health), and how I have been and what my plans are going forward. Don't forget to reflect on these aspects in your own life as well!

Sunday, October 31, 2021

Challenge your Eating Disorder Food Rules | EMBRACING FULL RECOVERY

Are you stuck in quasi-recovery from your eating disorder? Are you stuck, bargaining with the eating disorder and compromising on your food decisions? It's time to challenge your eating disorder food rules!